The Scorpion #1 – The Property Chronicle
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The Scorpion #1 An insider's take on the business of buying and selling property

The Agent

This is the first of a series of columns written by a residential estate agent about residential property. I have adopted a pseudonym because I am employed, and I would like, if necessary, to separate my views from those of my employers. I would also very much like to keep my job.

It would be fanciful to imagine that you are all scratching your heads, asking yourselves “but who can he or she be, this writer who so pretentiously insists on remaining anonymous?” Well, a lot of you know me already. I’m the guy (all right, I’ll give you that much), who broke the bad news to you that you had been outbid on that apartment you loved, (or ‘gazumped’ you, as you later put it). I’m the one who later didn’t value your house for as much as you’d hoped, which meant no-one wanted to buy it, (or something, the details aren’t important). That guy! It’s a shame they couldn’t get the guy who sponsored your children’s school fete for commercially dubious reasons – I know you really liked that guy. Or the one who you bumped into at a barbecue once, who told the brilliant story about the bloke who bought the wrong flat by mistake, and no-one noticed for years. He would have been brilliant.

Anyway, you’re stuck with me.

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